Jeff Stahler for October 06, 2015

“A big shot is a little shot who kept on shooting!” See! No politics!

Sponsored by your local NRA who says, ‘Keep guns out of the schools.’

Hundreds of times each day we hurtle past each other at 55 mph or more, two feet apart, in two ton machines heading in opposite directions. And you worry whether one of the occupants has a gun?

I’ve lived to 75 without ever laying my hands on a gun. I don’t lock my doors. I’ve lived in big ugly cities and dared to go in parking lots at night. I’ve been followed home by equally big ugly men in cars and solved that problem by pulling into a police station parking lot. All before cell phones. No, I’m not some Incredible Hulk…I’m a 4 foot 11 female. Somehow, I’m still here. The whole self defense thing is a crock. If no one had guns no one could claim they “need” guns.

I remember a cartoon where one kid is saying “trick or treat” and the other one has his hands on a detonator – with the wires leading where?Might mention, many homicides are done with hammers!License hammers too?Question of the day: Were any of these mass shootersNRA members?

I keep hearing pleas for more gun control laws, but never hear any concrete suggestions. So here is one. To buy a gun you must prove that you are mentally stable. You must sign a piece of paper that allows the gun seller to check all your personal records to make sure that you have never been to a psychiatrist, are not on an antidepressant or sleeping pills or other mood-altering drugs (legal or illegal). Yes, alcohol counts, so AA members need not apply. A check of your credit card records should reveal if you make frequent purchases at the wine store.

They should also be able to check that do not have any personal problems like bad credit, debt, overdue credit cards, etc. that might encourage you to use a weapon to commit a robbery.

You should have to provide a list of 5 references and they can be asked for the names of another 5 people who know you.

The search should continue all the way down to your kindergarten report card to see if you learned how to play nice with others or if you ever hit Susie Derkins with a water balloon.

The gun must be equipped with a GPS, so that the government knows its location at all times.

Of course none of these measures will stop your mommy from buying you a gun and giving it to you.

m.dailykos.com/news/GunFail