Close to Home by John McPherson for December 15, 2017

Naw. Just a few minor scratches. They won’t even notice.

Not to worry. The license plate will fall off as we drive away, the whole thing was caught on the store’s camera’s, and your GoPro was on transmit. I think you’re covered.

Smile! You’re on Candid Camera.

I saw something in a parking lot that was as funny as this. The parking lot had raised concrete curbs so you wouldn’t drive straight thru the lot. A driver wasn’t gonna let that stop him. He drove over one of them. But what happened was the bump of doing that broke the rusted rebar and the back tires would only drag a 12’ section of curb no matter what he did. Funniest thing I ever saw.

If there was someone in the car, the note will be unnecessary.

Just leave one of your Mary Kay cards.

The classic is “People watching think I’m leaving a note with my name and phone number. I am not.”

Why do they always portray women doing things like this? I think men are more likely to get in big traffic trouble.

Just tell the police that these are two car attempting to mate!

Years back; when I was a smart ass; I was in a parking lot and I witnessed one VW Beetle backing up slowly and another VW Beetle came around from another lane and bumped into the first VW. The front bumper of the second VW bounce on top of the back bumper of the first. (locked bumpers) Both drivers got out to survey the situation. I walked up and asked if I could have the pick of the litter. The two drivers didn’t appreciate my humor!

Well, you’re already leaving your muffler, so…

Should you…? Of course you should!

The real question is will you?

No.