Matt Bors for November 09, 2007

Transcript:

It turns out that Oprah's all-girl school in Africa is a seedy den of TORTURE and SEX ABUSE... Teacher: Or as we call it, "enhanced teaching techniques." Which makes it like most overseas American operations. But when O found out, she did what our government would NEVER do: she stopped it, then apologized. Oprah: I ruined my outer layer of makeup crying over this. Actually, at first she tried to will it away with POSITIVE THINKING... Oprah: Please oh please oh please oh please oh please oh... The Secret But AFTER that she contacted authorities. The teacher denies subjecting students to beatings, humiliation and sexual perversion. Soldier: Or as we call it, "morning," "noon" and "night"!